Days 12-14 Rules, Time, Stubbornness

Love Dare - Day 14
Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse.
Ecclesiastes 9:9

I'm not sure what we'll do here today as most time when we are not working, we are together. It's just that we're always doing some sort of chore! I'll have to see what I can do.


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Love Dare - Day 13
Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement and resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.
Mark 3:25

Sas typed up the default rules from the book when I was at our daughter's softball game. I later realized that this was a moment I could have handled better and exercised some of the advise from this book. However, at the time, I accused her of taking over and doing it herself, complaining that we were supposed to do it together. This pretty much ruined the conversation for the rest of the day. When I thought about it afterwards, I knew taht I should have looked at it as a time when she thought of me when I wasn't there. She thought of me and did something for me without me asking and I should have appreciated it more.

I also shared with her some insecurity that I have. Before I thought it was that I felt unloved, but I do know that she loves me. So I think that for some reason, I just don't feel special. I don't know why, but I need to think differently I guess.


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Love Dare - Day 12
Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse.
Philippians 2:4

Our disagreement was the wording of what the dare was for the day! We actually didn't argue, I just thought it was to willingly agree with your spouse on something. I was wrong so I gave in to her. But it wasn't a normal disagreement.

The chapter discusses stubbornness. I think I always had quick temper where we'd fight because I would over-react, say stupid stuff, and/or exaggerate. I'd say something in a mean tone. But I always used to give in and beg forgiveness. Recently, or for the past couple years I have no idea - I've been much more stubborn. When we fight, I don't want to give in anymore. Ever. If none of our disagreements is her fault and they're all mine, that just can't be right. My thought was that I was going to increase my wall and be even more stubborn so that she would have to give in first sometimes. But this didn't make things better, it only made arguments worse. Hopefully I can not only reduce my quick words, quick anger, but also reduce my stubbornness.